Monday, April 10, 2006

Today was the first day of my daughter's Spring Break. Each year I celebrate this "holiday" by making the same tired jokes in my blog. I cleverly juxtapose a cliched MTV-style booze-fueled spring break with the more staid reality of caring for a six year-old whose school has closed for the week.

I'll be doing the same thing again this year.

SPRING FREAKIN' BREAK 2006!!!

The bacchanalia began this morning with EXTREME apple juice shots. Daisy easily pounded half of one while I guzzled down a couple mugs of coffee. OUTRAGEOUS!

Afterwards, Daisy and I took a WICKED drive across town 'cause she was jonesing to hang with one of her gal pals for a house party/playdate. When I dropped her off, I found that I had forgotten both her eyeglasses and her lunch. INSANELY EXCELLENT!! I had a rockin' time driving back home and then back across town again to deliver these party essentials. I totally almost kind of caught some air on a gnarly SF hill.

Way!

You get the idea.

Afterwards I did some birthday shopping for Hank. I think mostly what she needs for her birthday is a better nom du blog. This "Hank" thing has served its purpose pretty well, but perhaps it's not the perfect moniker. There's a pretty thin line between isn't-it-funny-to-pretend-my-wife-has-a-boy's-name and the inevitable addiction to hot man-on-man love. I'm clumsy enough without needing to tread upon that type of slippery slope.

I'm now accepting ideas for her new name.

Party on!

14 comments:

Will said...

Anything but anything in the grain of Instawife... except maybe Ifeway wouldn't be so bad.

Will said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Will said...

Hi Hank (BTW), seemed rude not to say hi. Unfortunately that deleted comment is me saying the seconf half of this comment without the first.

Mike said...

Will, I'll pass your greeting onto the wife. And "ifeway" ain't half bad!

tinyhands said...

You have a societal obligation to carry a camera and take pictures of just such gatherings, if only to prove that it isn't an April Fool's joke.

(What, I can't make the same tired comment?)

Mike said...

Tiny, surpisingly, there is a limit to the creepy-vibe I'm willing to exude.

(you sure can)

Unknown said...

I like Ifeway. Clever! Ankhay, not so much.

How about Hannah? It's close enough to Hank, but more girlie like your wifey.

It's a bit long, though. Your fingers might cramp up typing it.

Mike said...

My fingers are essential to my career. Without them, I'm forced to repeatedly slam my face against the keyboard, desperately hoping that my giant schnozz hits the intended keys. Sadly, both your votes are for 6-letter words.

Unknown said...

Doh!

zelda1 said...

How about a wife named sue. Sue is short, it's easy to remember, and there are pleny of songs with Sue in them. LIke Wake up little susie, A man named sue, a dog named sue, a woman named sue with a big niche for tapestries. There are more, but I have forgotten them all. So, why not Sue.

Anonymous said...

I think too sudden a transition would be confusing for all your readers... how about something like "Hanketta", at least for the time being?

Mike said...

Zelda1, Sue, eh? It's certainly short enough, but it lacks sort of connection either to me, my blog, or my actual wife. Still, it's in the running and I appreciate your offering.

Chess, I'm not interested in a transition name, but Hanketta is good enough to be a permanent one. It's on the short list, baby!

Anonymous said...

I'm going to vote for "Brains". Clearly daisy get 'em from somewhere.

--Pablo

Mike said...

Pablo, how wude!!