Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Usually within minutes of meeting a crazy person you can tell.

Sometimes it's the I-don't-give-a-crap appearance. Other times it's the wild look in their eyes. Many times what gives it away is the Crazy Idea. Seems that crazy folk always have a headful of crazy ideas that come spilling out of their flapping gums.

Well, you can be damn sure of one thing, my friends, what I'm about to suggest is NOT a Crazy Idea. It is a fundamental truth of the universe, on par with the mythical grand unification theory. I did not come to this idea easily, nor have I presented it without a near lifetime of evidence supporting it. For the betterment of all mankind, I proudly present the first of Mike's Important Ideas: Nearly All Foods Are Improved By The Addition of Chocolate Chips

Ta dah! So simple! So very true!

Now, I'll admit that not all foods require chocolate. I don't really want chocolate chips on my over-medium eggs, or nestled in my broccoli. So, here are the exceptions to my rule:
  • Foods with meats (including eggs and fish)
  • Foods with vegetables (including quasi veggies like tomatoes)
  • Foods with savory sauces
That's it! Everything else is improved by, nay, virtually REQUIRES chocolate chips.

Bread with chocolate chips? Yum!
Breakfast cereal with chocolate chips? Mmmm!
Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with chocolate chips? Yes!!
A bowl of plain pasta? Not so plain now!

Fruits? Man, I cannot believe someone has not genetically engineered apples and bananas to have little chocolate chips in them! This is EASILY a billion dollar market! Come on, Monsanto! My taste buds await.

I want chocolate in my rice, pancakes, and would it kill you to put some chocolate chips in my chocolate bar? So good!

And, frankly, chocolate could be added to a variety of dishes on my exception list. Mole sauce, anyone?

Let's make this happen. It's an Important Idea. Add some chocolate to your foods today.


The Tart said...

OK, so what I think is this .... your endorphins are still in over-drive fm the trek in the muddy woods with Dolface. You are now in choco-holic frenzy. ; )

So for the record Tarty-phins would like the sweet chips in their applesauce & popcorn!

Melted smooch,
The Tart

Mike said...

Jocelyn, applechocsauce and chocolatecorn! Excellent snacks! I approve.

zelda1 said...

Oh my gods, you are a man after my chocolate chips. I can't believe that I am not the only one who believes, who puts chocolate chips on everything. My grandchildren love the chocolate chip in malto meal and in pancakes and if you haven't tried it, a chocolate chip melt is delicious, just use plain bread though or you can use those pound cakes sliced thin and use real butter. OH my gosh, I thought I was the only one. Mike, you rock, or should I say, Mike you Chip?

Janelle Renee said...

So, what you are trying to tell us is that you are crazy.

It's ok.

We already knew that, and we still love you.

Mike said...

Zelda, of course I've tried a chocolate chip melt! Do I look like a rookie?

JR, that whole intro about Crazy people was to stave off the inevitable naysayers such as yourself.

Janelle Renee said...

Really? Because it didn't sound like it. Sounded more like a "love me even though I'm weird."

Or, I don't know, maybe even a cry for help.

Like you, I just call it as I see it. (And, of course, like this time, I've been lotsa timsa.)

Janelle Renee said...

I meant to write:
(And, of course, like this time, I've been WRONG lotsa timsa.)

Mike said...

Oh, jr, maybe you know me too well. HELP! For the love of god, help me, because I've FOUND THE FREAKIN' SECRET TO EATING DELICIOUS FOODS!!

Janelle Renee said...

Yep. Crazy.

Glad I'm not alone.

The Tart said...

The dorphins & the sweet chips have made Mr. Cuppa a madman. AND yup we luv him just this way.

More choc chips pleaze 4 his gatorade, natch!

Hershey kiss,
The Tart
; )

tinyhands said...

Hey, you got your chocolate in my peanut butter!

Mike said...

Tart, hmmmm, chocolate gatorade you say? I like it!

Tiny, I spent a few minutes with my daughter trying to get her to think of foods that would be worse with chocolate chips. Since she's deathly allergic to peanuts and has never had peanut butter, she promptly suggested peanut butter. I then had to describe that decades-old ad to her, in an effort to convey how much BETTER chocolate can make peanut butter.