Sunday, March 14, 2010

As I grudgingly changed the clocks this morning, I mentally composed this blog post, itemizing in my head all the reasons why I hate this time-shifting game we play. However, since this is one of my many annual rants (hello Thanksgiving dinner!), I needed to make sure that I hadn't already covered this ground in a previous entry.

So, I searched my blog for mentions of Daylight Savings Time and found this.

Crikey! Apparently I LOVE these time-shifting shenanigans. Gah! All the hatred I have for moving my clocks forward is more than balanced out by the profound love I have for moving the clocks back. I apparently refer to that as the "best day of the year"! Kind of takes the hot air out of my rant sails.

So, uh, moving on to other topics....

Last week, during a lunch at work, we were discussing our favorite foods. I absurdified the topic by asking people what they'd eat if they only had 5 minutes left to live, and were forced to spend that time eating. Most folks suggested chocolate or some other form of sweets. Raymond, however, took a different approach.

Raymond: Is it just me dying in 5 minutes or is all of humanity coming to an end?
Me: What? Uh..., I guess all of humanity.
Raymond: Oh, ok, then I choose human flesh.
Me: You want the very last thing you ever eat to be... human flesh.
Raymond: When else am I going to get a chance to eat it?

He went on to explain that since he wanted to be sure of the right quality and fat-content of the meat, he would choose to eat his own leg.

The weird part of all this is that I can't find any fault in his logic.

Impressed by Raymond's creativity, I choose to ask my daughter the same question at dinner that night. She contemplated the question for about 2 seconds and then said, "I'd eat chocolate for the first 4 minutes and 50 seconds. Then, for the last 10 seconds, I'd finally try peanut butter."

Daisy is deathly allergic to peanuts.

Man, people have surprisingly thoughtful answers to my unsurprisingly stupid questions.


Mike Duffy said...

Raymond's distinction (everyone or just me) doesn't seem to make much of a difference. He won't be around for the consequences in either scenario.

Interesting question, though. And, as Daisy pointed out, why not multiple items?

For the record: Ice cream.

Mike said...

Mike, yes, Daisy correctly chose multiple items, but I understand Raymond's point. If society continues to go on after I die, I don't want to be remembered as The Guy Who Ate Human Flesh As His Last Meal.

nrd2 said...

daisy continues to blow me away. i'm so glad i get to hear about her. (i'll take seared fois gras,)

Ms.PhD said...


Sue said...

Definitely super cheesy pepperoni pizza and then Java Chip ice cream.