Wednesday, June 04, 2008

It's Day 5 of my diet.

I've settled into a routine now. I've modeled my dieting technique after my marathon training technique. Much as my approach to long-distance running emphasizes rest and non-running days, my diet emphasizes scheduled periods of non-dieting. I refer to these periods of non-dieting time as "mealtime".

Baby steps, baby.

I briefly discussed my diet with my coworker, Ralph, yesterday. In the last year or so Ralph has started paying a lot of attention to his workouts and what he eats, so he was interested to hear about my diet (unlike all of you poor bastards). I explained my plan to lose 7 or 8 pounds in the next couple months.

He scoffed.

Ralph: That's ridiculous.
Me: It's too big of a goal? Too small?
Ralph: Too big. There's no way you'll lose 8 pounds in 2 months without going on a really drastic diet.
Me: Seriously? To be honest, I have not researched this at all, so I take your opinion seriously, but 8 pounds sounded pretty reasonable to me.
Ralph: Sure, it would be if you were significantly overweight, but you're not. Losing 8 pounds off your frame is going to be really hard. How are you modifying what you eat?
Me: Well, I thought I'd snack less. And eat less dessert. Maybe cut out some beers?
Ralph: Oh, come on! You think that's going to get you there? I mean, it's not like you were eating a big piece of chocolate cake every night!
Me: But I was eating a big piece of chocolate cake every night.
Ralph: Really? You're serious?
Me: I am. I really like chocolate cake.
Ralph: Damn. Maybe you'll get close, but I say you'll be lucky to lose 4.

Place your bets now, ladies and gentlemen.

13 comments:

Avery Gray said...

I got my money on you. I think you can do it.

Lola said...

A man who voluntarily places his lower torso in ice water would probably excise some non-essential flesh if it meant winning a bet. No thanks, I'm out.

Sister--Helen said...

Well Mike, you know anyone can pretend to be anyone on the net so I just want to warn you soy protein drinks are a good source to build mussel and loose fat and it gives you tons of energy. I took them for years and felt very good….....BUT if you happen to be a post menopausal woman it may be linked to breast cancer....Food for thought... I mean just in case you are a Michelle and not Mike..You know those handsome pictures you post might not be really you....

SiƓn said...

You'll do it. And then some. My money is on an 11 pound loss

Mike said...

Thanks to you all for your belief in my ability to magically lose weight without seriously dieting! Your faith in magic is impressive indeed. Obviously I'm not quite sure what to make of 4th Sister's uncertainty about my gender, but I saw the word "handsome" in there, so I'm good with it.

dolface said...

As someone who's even frailer than Mike and who boings up and down 10 pounds on a regular basis, I'd just like to offer my considered opinion: Ralph is an idiot.

Snacking less, eating fewer desserts, and cutting out say, 3 beers a week will get you most of the way there.

Running will take care of the rest.

If you're REALLY worried you can do something drastic like not having seconds at dinner during the week, but don't go crazy.

Mike said...

Dolface, skipping seconds at dinner would violate my "no dieting at mealtime" rule, so that's out. And did I mention that Friday nights don't count either? A man has to eat dessert SOMETIME!

Sue said...

Been there and done that a million times. Your plan is sound.

Other tips: don't eat after 6 or 7 pm. Biggest meal should be lunch. Dessert at lunch is better than dessert at dinner. Cut down on carbs. Eat more veggies. I feel pretty sure I don't have to worry about your protein intake.

Good luck skinny!

Mike said...

Hey Sue, thanks for the encouragement, but I think I'm going to have to skip that low-carb part. Carbs = yummy.

Anonymous said...

Figure that reducing caloric intake by 500 calories a day (and keeping everything else the same) should cause you to lose 1 pound a week (1 lb = 3,500 calories).

So, how big was that daily piece of cake?

See also: The Hacker's Diet.

Mike said...

Hey Mike, well, the cake might not have been 500 calories, but if you add in the afternoon snack, and the most-days beer, then I'm probably right around 500 calories.

Ms.PhD said...

Yeah, I think you can do it. MrPhD lost a lot of weight by cutting out soda (mountain dew, coke), beer, and dessert.

Just cut back on sugar and alcohol and watch, I bet you'll see an effect...

And keep eating your brussel sprouts! MrPhD still refers to you as "brussel sprout guy"!

Mike said...

Ms. PhD, I'm brussel sprout guy? That's excellent. I've been wanting a nickname for a long time.