Monday, April 09, 2007

I don't make friends easily. I suppose it could be because I'm sort of an ass, but I prefer the theory that it's just kind of hard for grownups to make friends. If you were to draw a graph of friend-making ability vs. age, it would it would peak at around age six, and then slowly drop off as age increased. Also, the desire to graph friend-making ability vs age pretty much puts an end to anyone wanting to be your friend.

Group situations are easier though. Hank and I occasionally reach out to other couples and that sometimes works out. We've met a few other nice couples through Daisy's school and that's led to a couple of social outings. We didn't become best friends forever, but as long as there are a few laughs or some interesting conversation, that's all I can really ask. Well, an orgy for once in my life would be nice too, but that may take more planning or booze than I'm willing to take on.

So, a couple weeks ago I'm at one of Daisy's extracurricular activities and I'm chatting with another dad, who is half of a couple that we've socialized with. We had some idle chit chat and then this:

Ray: So, have you seen that new movie, 300?
Me: Nah. Looks pretty cool though.
Ray: Are you interested in seeing it?
Me: Sure. I think we could go for that. You thinking that we could all share a babysitter some night?
Ray: Well, that, or we don't even have to get a babysitter.... We could uh....
Me: .... Leave the wives at home?
Ray: Yeah.
Me: 300 probably isn't Hank's cup of tea.
Ray: Or Ella's either.

So, there it was. We planned an outing for just the two of us. It was sort of a man date, a man date where we'd see a movie about the homo-erotic Greek empire, which is, I suppose, the sort of man date that goes well in San Francisco.

Tonight was our big date. We left the wives and children home, shared some popcorn, and watched muscled glistening hairless men slaughter each other on an Imax screen. It was my own tiny blip on the friend-making graph. Sure, he had to put up with my incessant blabbering about my baseball software, but that's part of what makes me so endearing.

What's up for next time? I suppose we could go shopping or maybe sit on our beds and talk about cute boys. Best friends forever!


Sue said...

You are not the only man who feels that way. Our culture is just not set up for men to make good friends after college unless they play sports together. It is a struggle for my hubby as well. Actually he's managed pretty well lately, after many years of me wondering if I would always be his only friend.

Mike said...

Hi Sue! Yeah, you make a point that I forgot to make in my post, that it's more of a male phenomenon than a female one. Maybe it's just that men are emotionally stunted.

mox said...

I think you're spot-on about that whole age/friend-making thing. I find it's harder the older I get, too. Of course it doesn't help that I'm a good bit older than most of Spawn's classmates' parents, so trolling the PTA for potential friends is a tough proposition. We've got very little in common other than we all have six year olds.

carey said...

It might be easier for you to make friends if you had a job to go to. But yeah, it's difficult for you guys, isn't it? I'm always telling the dh to PLEASE go find someone else to play with.

But orgies with the neighbors? Ugh. It's an orgy for them to witness my lingerie hanging out to dry.

Hey, and thanks for the mention in your list. I'm flattered. I'll return the compliment. It IS a compliment, isn't it?

Mike said...

Mox, as Lord Secretary of the PTA Board, I can assure you that that the PTA is NOT a good place to troll for friends.

Carey, I'm not suggesting that I have an orgy with ALL the neighbors, just the hot women. THAT kind of orgy. You know, the imaginary kind.

And the "DH"? Is that your Designated Husband?

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