Thursday, March 15, 2007

This zit on my face is enormous now. It's growing ravenously. It's just a matter of time, before I'm just a person-sized blemish smashed face-first into the ever-expanding Zit-o-sphere.

Then it will consume us all.

My primary skin consultant, Hank, is out of town for a couple days on another one of her "business" trips. This time she's in "San Diego". Sure, sure. And in her absence, I'm "taking care" of Daisy, by making sure she gets to "school" and sometimes even "feeding" her.

Anyway, without Hank to consult on my pimple, Pierre, I'm been going into her Shelf O' Lotions and plucking out things that look expensive. I thought a couple applications of the glycolic acid lotion would do the trick, but the zit was undeterred. It gobbled up the glycolic, laughed, belched, and only seemed to grow stronger. Now I'm feeding it raw organic ground beef.

It's a lot of work.

So, come home soon, Hank. Pierre needs you.


carey said...

Try windex. Seriously.

David said...

Try putting toothpaste on it. *Shrugs* I read it on another blog. Let me know if you try it and it works.

Mike said...

Now you guys are just screwing with me.

tinyhands said...

My rule is that anything that shouldn't be sticking up gets pushed back down. Maybe you could get Daisy to either stand or jump on it if it won't go back down.

Mike said...

Did I mention that it's very tender?