My wife had a job interview today and I was eager to hear how it went.

Me: How did your interview go?

Hank:  It went pretty well!  I always enjoy talking about interesting subjects with smart people, so I enjoyed it.

Me:  You ENJOYED your interview?  Oh my god.  For me, it's like a rectal exam.  I'm frantically pulling chunks of bloody polyp out of my ass and throwing them on the table, yelling, "Is THIS what you want?  IS IT?!?!?"

Hank:  Wow.  I think I know why you don't do well in interviews.