Now I'm starting to get spooked.
I went for a run yesterday at lunch. On Thursdays I try to do some sort of speed workout, so yesterday I alternated intervals of easy running and hard running. During one of my easy intervals, I was jogging along, not hurting anyone, when suddenly out of nowhere a tree jumped in front of me, slamming into my left shoulder.
I didn't need go to to the emergency room, like I had to a few weeks ago when I was attacked by the garbage can, but I do have a pretty good looking scrape on my shoulder. It will heal, but it frightens me a bit.
It's like I've suddenly been thrust into a war against stationary objects and I'm losing. This is very concerning. I use stationary objects every day. If, for example, my office chair drops its apparent policy of non-involvement in this war, then my workday is going to become much more challenging.
How much longer before the coffee maker develops a taste for blood? Or my toothbrush? Or even my beloved Chillow?
These are dark times. Hold me.