I am happy to report that I have nothing of consequence to report. This was the first weekend in a while that we spent at home without anything important to accomplish. It wasn't quite the gosh-we-have-nothing-to-do-so-should-we-see-another-movie-or-instead-light-my-farts-on-fire-? laziness of pre-child days, but it was still pretty easy.

On Saturday afternoon we drove down to Palo Alto to go swimming with another family. I spent a fair amount of time in the pool with my daughter, Daisy, and this other five year-old boy. I believe they permanently etched the phrase, "LOOK AT ME!" on my eardrums.

Boy: Look at me! I'm hopping on one foot!
Daisy: Me too! I can hop on one foot!
Me: Remarkable.
Daisy: Now look at me! I'm doing a trick! No, wait, it didn't work. I'll try again....No, wait...keep looking....oh, one more time...LOOK!
Boy: I'M SWIMMING! LOOK AT ME!!
Daisy: I'M SWIMMING TOO! LOOK AT ME!
Me: I've alerted the media.
Daisy: Daddy! You're not looking at me!!

I took a brief break at one point to go try and swim a couple laps in the adult pool. I'm a horrible swimmer, so swimming an entire lap is rather tiring for me. After I finished 2 laps (forward and back is 2 laps, right?), some stranger came up to me and felt obligated to give me swimming tips. "I was exhausted just watching you," he clucked, "you'll swim a lot faster if you keep your head in the water."

Ahh, advice from strangers. Always delightful. I wasn't sure what the correct response was. Would Miss Manners suggest furiously splashing the know-it-all or merely giving him a titty-twister? Etiquette is hard. Instead I nodded my head and admitted that although I understood the theory, in practice I wasn't good at it. Then, I made a hasty exit, sans titty-twisting.

That evening we strolled down to an ice cream parlor that serves about a dozen different flavors of Daisy-friendly ice cream. She was delighted to be stymied by such a selection. Dairy-free ice cream is hard enough to find, but to find an actual ice cream parlor that'll scoop it onto a cone (a damn vegan cone!) with sprinkles to boot is quite a find. Bless the good people at Maggie Mudd.

Today was mostly chores and pushing Daisy around on swings. Meanwhile the wife did "special projects". I hope she doesn't get laid off from this wife gig.

Kiss kiss.