Oh, 2006, I hardly knew ye. It seems like just last January that you were new and shiny and filled with January-inspired gumption. After a mere 12 months of exhausting time passage, you became frail and feeble, unable to resist the black hole suction of the past. Now, like many of your more famous ancestors (such as 2000, 1984, and 1969), you are dead to me.
Now then, this should be the blog entry where I review my 2006 New Year's resolutions and offer up my 2007 ones. That would be my task had I ever gotten around to making any New Year's resolutions in 2006. Although I could flagellate myself for ignoring obvious areas of self-improvement, instead I'll just point out that I didn't not accomplish any 2006 resolutions.
And, yes, my coffee mug is half full.
Well, actually, I sort of had two half-assed resolutions. I wanted to run 1000 miles in 2006 and I did achieve that goal with a grand total of 1059.45 miles. Although averaging less than 3 miles a day is not a monumental running achievement, it's pretty sweet for a guy like me who cursed every one of those 1059.45 miles.
Also, near the end of 2005 I noticed that googling for the phrase "giganticasses.com" yielded my blog as the #2 result. I made a One Year Plan for my blog to surpass the #1 result, which happened to be the website, www.giganticasses.com (NSFW, unless you work in an ass-related industry. Proctologists, you may click with reckless abandon).
In 2006 I acted on my One Year Plan by doing nothing at all. This careful execution of the Plan details resulted in complete success. I am proud to announce that I Am Prepared to Give Up at Any Time is now your #1 result for googling giganticasses.com and its domain-less cousin, giganticasses.
All I'm left with then is the task of identifying my 2007 resolutions. Here goes:
In 2007 I do hereby resolve to come up with some resolutions in time for New Year's Day in 2008.